From Trash Bags to Suitcases

Well. If you have not heard, I am out. Praise God! I have so much of my journey to share with you, but it is impossible to even know where to start! The journey is not over - we have only turned onto a new road. There is a lot to be reflected on from the previous road of prison and how I ended up there however, there is a LOT to unpack and explore while we head in a new direction. The system is busted and broken and there are a lot of people who need to be advocated for - but more on that later.

I was able to get out in 6 months nearly to the day because of the First Step Act (FSA). For someone with a year and a day sentence, for the first 4 months of FSA programming (being signed up for evidenced based programs in the prison) you get 10 days shaved off of your sentence. After 4 months it becomes 15 days. I was given 60 days of halfway house time and essentially where halfway house time and FSA credit met, was how they got my out date. Notice I said SIGNED UP for the programs....you didn't have to actually do the programs - but there would have to be programs that existed in the first place in order to do them....but again, more on that later :)

I was sent to halfway house in Indianapolis. I live in Illinois. Every halfway house is different, and I mean it when I say, halfway house in so many ways was worse than prison. In other ways it was a giant blessing - the biggest blessing was that I was afforded the ability to attend court to fight for my children and was blessed with every other weekend custody as we continue to litigate and mediate. I called over 200 times and he never answered...not once. So, I am thankful for the halfway house time for the sole purpose of fighting for my babies - but that is about it. It is a joke and helping people? All I saw was obvious reasons of how and why people get sucked into the system and swallowed whole.

When I was picked up by my loved ones, my mother had packed me a suitcase of things I could have at the halfway house. Once we got to the halfway house they wouldn't allow me to bring in the suitcase but brought me a giant trash bag to dump all of my belongings into it and then I had to hoist the trash bag upstairs. I will write out the whole halfway house experience, but let me tell you - when I was picked up from the halfway house and dragged my trash bag out with my ankle monitor on my ankle I didn't mind one bit. I was not allowed to cross state lines for home confinement but I was able to stay at a close friend's house in Indy along with his partner. The day I was taken off the ankle monitor and off BOP custody, my loved ones gave me suitcases to pack my things in. I had a moment where it really was a core memory formed that I had always taken advantage of everything - including suitcases. We all have a rock bottom. My rock bottom was trash bags but today I am using suitcases....and pillows. I went 7 months without a pillow. Thank God for pillows - and so many other blessings.

I really can't express how thankful I am to you all for your support. Yessssssssss :) I am out of prison. I am on the other side. I hope you walk alongside me as I re-build and move forward on this journey - while advocating for the change that needs to occur in the system for all - but especially for the survived and punished. Love you guys, hold on to your forks!!!

P.S. please say a prayer for the girls still at FPC Marianna as a CAT 3 Hurricane is in route to directly impact them today. <3